Agony & Ecstasy, Venus in Pisces

pain relief AND chocolate lava cookies, if you can imagine that

For those of you new to me, and those who’d like to be reacquainted…

I’ve been receiving a number of new sign-ups to my list from my friend in the UK, Leah Whitehorse, Astrologer, who produces poetically beautiful daily write-ups on the archetypes. This is the best of Substack in action- writers helping one another grow. I hope that if you don’t know Leah, you soon will.

You’re all reminding me of a conversation I once had while visiting my friend Holly (Holiday Mathis, syndicated horoscope writer). I was having a conversation with her husband, Stuart, about creative identity. He asked a question that caused me to reply, I don’t know if I want to be a writer or astrologer. I was at that urgent phase of life-questioning - I thought I had to choose. His reply was, Oh, you should be a writer. You’ll have way more options.

I don’t know if this is true; I do now know that writing is in my bones in the way that bone marrow is. Astrology used to be the main creative muse fueling my writing… but it no longer leads the way in my day-to-day as it once did. However, I am always aware of what sign and phase the Moon is in, and the daily aspects it makes. Essentially, this is how I began learning astrology - by feeling into the energy as it was actually happening, and sometimes using that to guide my decisions about what step to take next. Astrology was an experiential process for me; it always has been. I have a ninth house Cancer Sun conjunct late Saturn in Gemini; I learn everything through experience.

Which brings me to this point of introduction. Astrology is just one tool for me. After four books featuring astrology, over the years I needed to develop new tools that have nothing to do with astrology. I pivoted into intuitive and energetic realms - which you get to experience on my podcast.

Yet astrology often finds it’s way back into my work. My best friends are astrologers. Most of my fan base are former clients, or you who have read my books -so know astrology. AND, on April 28, here in Honolulu, HI, I will be co-teaching a one-day workshop on Your Vesta Code about the asteroid and archetype Vesta in your birth chart (there’s 1 spot left! Join us!).

All this is to say: Welcome. E Komo Mai. And: I’m a writer. I mean…c’mon :-)

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VENUS IS IN PISCES: I have always associated this planet-sign combination with ecstasy and agony both. Perhaps it’s because those I’ve known with this Venus sign seem to suffer a bit more than most, romantically. On the flip side, they also have a direct connection to Bliss -often through the mind-bending ways they can daydream a thing into their reality. Whether that reality seems sustainable to anyone else, matters little. They are totally in love with it.

These are the soulful poets, unrequited lovers, modern day courtesans. One of my ex-clients was a call-girl; she had Venus in Pisces. A worldly Venus-in-Pisces guy had girlfriends in many ports of call but had difficulty keeping a long-term relationship. Another Venus in Pisces pined for a man who was unavailable yet she believed was her soul mate- and so kept booking sessions (when I was the Love Alchemist) to see if I could help her to lure him in. Do you see what I mean? A bit of agony, a bit of ecstasy. Peanut butter. Jelly.

“Being human is no picnic; it’s downright difficult. We have a bevy of spiritual tasks to accomplish - tasks mired in human conditions that challenge us at our very core to go beyond our perception of them. We all have the capacity to develop a more spiritual understanding of life; it isn’t easy, but for some it’s essential. For Venus in Pisces, developing this spiritual perception makes all the difference between being consumed by pain and discovering happiness.” -Venus Signs

Inspired by Venus, now in Pisces, I decided to mix things up and share a bit of both. ECSTASY: A recipe for the most decadent, guilt-free, double chocolate chip cookie. And the AGONY: Two great tools I use for (physical) pain relief.

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First, the ECSTASY. And a story about this recipe.

us, newly married, in Todos Santos. We were all so young!

This recipe’s genesis began a summer long ago… long before international cell phone plans existed (can you imagine it?)… in Baja, Mexico.

I had flown from SFO to Cabo, got on a Mexican bus and rode for hours, by myself and without a cell phone, to Todos Santos, to meet John and his girls - who were on a 3 day Baja road-trip in a pimped out surf van (what had we been thinking?! We were so young and adventurous). The family arrived at midnight in one piece, just in time to celebrate my birthday the next day.

It was June, we were in Mexico, it was my birthday = a piñata was called for, and this is what happened. I put on my blindfold, and played piñata with our hotel maid and a few local girls to whom I could not communicate because my Spanish is no bueno but I saw they were thrilled to be at this gringa’s party! Truly, though, that birthday, and that year…It was all about the cake.

The town of Todos Santos, as we would discover, was essentially CLOSED. It was off-season and so damn hot that everyone who could go elsewhere, did. But off-season has always been budget-friendly for the Shepherds, and back then we were a family of five who relied on every peso we had.

in case you are wondering, June in Todos Santos is HOT!

That morning, I awoke to blazing heat and the crow of a very plucky rooster. Foraging for breakfast, we walked through the desolate town, which was probably quite cute, we decided, when it was OPEN! A classic Cancerian, I am pretty much always worried about food so I worried we wouldn’t find any place for breakfast. But then we saw a blessed oasis: A cute little tourista café with baked goods. Amidst shuttered doors, what a relief to see this homey, welcoming place! As we scanned the menu, and fanned our hot selves, John counted out pesos. We only had so much for each meal, and full breakfasts for five were NOT in the budget. There was a decision to be made.

John said: We don’t have enough money to buy breakfast for each of us but we DO have enough money for dessert for each of us. ←This is why I love this brilliant man. He has some crazy-good ideas. Dessert for breakfast.

…What did I spy with my little eye? A darkly chocolate, devilishly dense and moist-looking cake, which also appeared to have buttercream milk chocolate frosting. Que es esto? I asked. Mexican chocolate cake, was the reply.

actual photo of the cake

You may recall I don’t eat sugar or grains. Well, IT WAS MY BIRTHDAY! And it was decadent, delightful, and so incredibly calorie-dense that I ate that one piece several times over the course of that birthday (it may’ve been the only thing I ate). I was in heaven. BUT wait, I’ve also eaten it many times since in my imagination because I have never tasted anything like that chocolate cake.

(((Once, because he knows how much I loved that cake, John even tried to replicate the experience. He happened to be in the Cabo area, so he called up the little cafe and requested a whole cake. He would bring it back home to California on the plane; he would surprise me for my birthday that year! He ended up coming home with what looked like a Safeway sheet cake. Tres leches, he sadly said. He explained that he had requested THE cake from the café but there was a misunderstanding. When he arrived and saw this cake, they said: Oh, you wanted THAT cake! We only make that on Sundays.)))

Recently, John - because by now this cake had become so legend that we weren’t sure what that cake was actually made from. Fairy dust? - discovered the darkest, blackest, cocoa we’ve ever seen. I think it’s used for lava cake type desserts. Here in Hawaii folks like their lava-themed food.

This is why this recipe has been long in coming. Since I can’t justify eating a whole cake when it’s not my birthday, we did decide on cookies. After a lifetime of no sugar, I also only recently discovered (zero-calorie, zero-glycemic index anything, but it looks and bakes just like sugar)… monk fruit sugar has 10000% revolutionized my ability to enjoy baked goods life.

…May I present another Shepherd+ChatGPT recipe collaboration? From Chat: These double chocolate chip cookies offer a decadent, gluten-free treat that's perfect for chocolate lovers looking to enjoy a healthier version of their favorite dessert. Enjoy baking and indulging in these rich, chocolatey cookies!